Gratitude makes me feel ALIVE!

For those who know me and come to see me regularly, I am oh so grateful for your flexibility last month! I gifted my little sister Rachel with the role of doula at her daughter's recent birth. With the way birth goes and the unknown plans of her old little soul, Maggie Marie, we were eagerly awaiting labor to start for about 3 weeks! Thus, my life was kind of up in the air during this time. Rachel's 1st labor went right on time, so there was some hope that this one would be the same, if not early! Little Maggie had her own plans though. 10 days past her due date some labor pains started, however Rachel was not very dilated. We ended up making 2 trips to the hospital. Over 48 hours of labor, her husband, Alan and I stayed with her. Rachel had an emergency c-section with her first born, Jackson, and intended to have a VBAC this time around.

I must admit that I've attended 3 births as a doula and not one of them went according to plan-- and two ended up as c-sections. I had a burning desire to witness a vaginal birth other than my own homebirth. My sister Rachel is an amazing manifestor! She was so bound and determined to have this baby naturally that she switched from a regular OBGYN to a midwife practice just 8 weeks before her due date! This turned out to be the RIGHT decision! 

Long story short, I was able to witness the birth of my 9lb 4 oz niece vaginally and it was a truly miraculous experience! I am absolutely smitten with this little cherub!

During that waiting time, I was reminded of the delicacy of life. Each moment is SO very sacred. Losing my sister suddenly really hounded in the importance of appreciating each and every moment!

Here I am, completely in love with this new little being. THIS is the stuff that life is made out of! 

After Maggie's birth and 3 weeks of sleeping lightly-- 2 nights of barely any sleep-- I REALLY appreciated getting my Zzzz's!!! I went through nowhere near the sleep deprivation that my sister did, but as a single mom running a healing practice, I definitely felt maxed out energetically! After a few weeks, I'm back to normal energy levels. I'm OH SO GRATEFUL to all those women that act as doulas and midwives. It's truly a powerful calling and amazing offering to the world!

May you all find appreciation for the little things in your life....as every little breath we take is an awesome reminder of the sacredness of this thing we call LIFE!

What's the point of trying healing work?

What's the point? (Yep, let's just be blunt and upfront!)

I'm making a post about this in an upfront way because the Toltec way inspires me. Life is too short to candy coat things! I have heard a lot of people talk about how much they are spending on healthcare or having to spend upfront before they have no co-pays or can use their flex-spending. In the back of my mind I'm thinking, "So if these people choose to take their health into their own hands and get to the root cause-- then why aren't they choosing to come to people like me and do just that"? I will admit that"I" as healer have NOTHING to do with their healing. Their own belief in their ability do heal does. I am conduit for their own faith, and that's it!

We all have stress in our lives, hence each one of our minds and hearts could use a little healing. The human journey is just that-- a process of imperfection discovering its own faulty flawlessness ;). Our physical lives not only get cluttered with stuff, but so do our minds, bodies and hearts. Just like we clean our external environment and take care of our physical health and well-being-- we also need to take care of the state of our mind and heart.

The modalities offered at Inner Bloom-- Reiki, Metamorphic, Reflexology and Yoga therapy all clear the psyche, heart and body of excess clutter. A lot of us take time to clear our physical environment or focus on maintaining our physical health and well-being. Regular clearing of the mind and heart also keep us in pure alignment with our true state: peace and well-being.

I have been working with those who are committed to really devoting the time, money and energy to keeping themselves clear and seeing what an amazing effect it has on overall health, happiness and well-being! Chronic illness, psychological stress and emotional heaviness begin to release and in some cases disappear altogether! It is definitely an investment, an investment into your health and well-being on ALL levels. I know these services aren't covered by insurance, so for some that may mean skipping that nice meal out in favor of a session focused on healing YOU!

For me self growth is a passion! In college I chose to take my spending money and buy an unlimited monthly yoga pass and take Reiki courses in the summer. Hey, that was my fun! I wasn't a bar hopper-- but a self-healing workshop hopper ;-). And to this day I will take extra money and go to a workshop or class in lieu of a night of dinner and debauchery with the girls or a mani-pedi!

Motherhood has made self healing and personal growth an even stronger focus, as I want to be at my best for my daughter, Wren-- to set a good example and also offer her tools for her growth and well-being as she grows up!

This year has been one of tremendous growth and leaps of faith, like trying out a wellness practice and realizing that it just wasn't the right fit, because there wasn't complete support or belief in all the modalities I offer.

I recently tried to organize a Metamorphic Technique training in Rochester, bringing my teacher from London, UK all the way here to teach. However, after much effort, we just didn't have enough sign-ups to book the workshop. Letting it go took a few tries, but it felt so opening once i released it and realized this just wasn't the right time to host this training here-- not now!

Just last week, I organized my open house, an evening of art, healing, craft bazaar and socializing, all in an hour with ease and grace, getting Inner Bloom listed on the First Friday website as a venue! It's wonderful when things flow so gracefully and all works out. Makes you wonder why we fight the flow when something just isn't working?

The same goes for your draw to the services offered here or to working with me. When I gel with a client it's wonderful! My clients become like dear friends or family! I truly care about each one of you that works with me and want you to live your bliss-- your Highest most healthy version of yourSelf! This definitely takes dedication and commitment and it is beautiful to see it as it unfolds!

I love that quote, we are in each others' lives for a season, a reason, or a life-time. I definitely get attached and in my humanness feel sad when our seasons end, as they sometimes do, but I trust the process! And for those that are in my life or even practice for a longer haul, I so enjoy dancing the dance with you as I learn as much from you as you receive from coming in.

Everything truly does happen for a reason, and even though we don't always understand why, at least we get to enjoy the process and maybe someday on the road we get that clarity we once sought-- just maybe.

Peace, Love and Total TRUST in the Process!
Sarah ;-)

Deepening your Yoga...

When my sister died suddenly in 2000, I was in the middle of my 2nd semester of my junior year at SUNY Geneseo. I remember being awoken by a 2 am phone call from my mom, telling me Rebecca was in a coma. I was half in dream-land, so it didn't feel completely real. 72 hours later, she was taken off life support in Ohio, following the 3 day law they have set. My parents could have kept her a life, but with no brainwave activity, she would have been a vegetable. Rebecca had a Grand Mal seizure after complications with trying ecstasy. Her electrolytes were off because of complications with an eating disorder, which caused the seizure.

Heavy stuff. This was the truth, and made my reality seem very harsh, sad and desolate. Rebecca and I were 18 months apart and just becoming best friends again after years of drifting apart.

I had just joined the local yoga studio as a student unlimited member. At this time, I simply turned to my mat. I had been going to classes almost everyday before this happened, and went back, looking for some solace. Instead, I found my muscles spasming in a gentle class; it was too much-- I needed to stop my practice and slow down my life.

I ended up withdrawing from classes for the semester but didn't know what to do next. I was shocked by the fact that my yoga classes were too much for me, so I sought out one of my teachers for a private yoga session. It was JUST WHAT I NEEDED!

Why Private Yoga? I admit I was a bit intimidated to spend time with a teacher one to one. My perfectionist self said, "What if she tells me I'm doing it ALL WRONG?" However, the teacher I chose to learn from one to one was a very gentle and nurturing soul! Instead of having me do intense asana, she gave me a gentle restorative practice. In our session, she admitted that she lost a best friend who was like a sister suddenly too! She said she discovered something called Restorative Yoga and it helped her through the grief tremendously. I'd never done restorative at the time, but my teacher gave me a gentle flow plus one or two restorative poses to try daily and said, "See how it goes. You need to take it easy and be gentle with yourself right now."

I stuck with my private yoga session routine for many months and stopped going to regular classes, as my instincts told me that solo practice was the way to go! The private yoga session made me feel so cared for and much more confidant in my practice. I understood the yogic breath now and felt really comfortable with my ability to put myself into poses.

It was then that I developed a burning desire to learn more and more yoga (but we'll save that for another blog entry!).

Benefits of a Private Yoga Session

So, why private yoga? Why spend about $75 on a solo session with a teacher when you can spend about $15 on a group yoga class?

1) To boost confidance: When we feel we are doing something "wrong", there is a chance we are not getting the full benefits out of the post, because mentally we are holding ourselves back. When a teacher tells you (rather than manually corrects your pose walking by you in class) what you're doing that may be incorrect form and helps you make sure you can understand the root of your incorrectness, then you LEARN, and in turn become WAY MORE CONFIDANT on the mat -- which of course us yoga teachers swear translates off the mat as well!

2)To build a home practice: Many people go to their local yoga studio to practice, then get on with their lives when they leave the studio, perhaps even leaving their mat at the studio or in their car. For these folks, the practice is in the class only and that mat has never seen the comfort of their own home! It is a GREAT thing to be able to take your practice home with you integrates your yoga more deeply into your everyday life, so that you can pull out your mat and practice upon awakening or before bed (two of my favorite times) or treat is as a tool for stress relief and practice as needed! It also allows you to hone in on poses that work for you, instead of just doing the asanas your studio teacher tell you to do! Variety is the spice of life and your body is always changing-- so why not work with it and give it what it needs at any given time!

3)To get a personalized class: If you have the money and the time, why not skip the group class and get your own personalized class with a teacher one to one! I love personalizing classes. In small groups it's possible to get a bit more personal with students, but even easier one on one! You come in with back and hamstring stiffness, so we do a class to stretch and lengthen the hamstring, tone and stretch the back and core, your body will expand in ways that it may not have in a group class where the focus may have been more generalized. And the plus, you learned some asanas to take home with you and use regularly if these areas continue to be tight or hold chronic tension.

4)You get take home notes! In all my private sessions (can't speak for all teachers here, but my 1st private teacher gave me take home routine, complete with stick figure drawings!) I give my students notes of the poses we did written on carbon copy paper so I have a copy for their file as well. I do my best to give happy stick figure yogis in poses with detailed descriptions of what we talked about.

5) Therapy for Injuries or chronic conditions: There is a whole branch of yoga teachers now doing "Yoga Therapy", which is basically physical therapy in the yogic form! I've used clients' physical therapy routine as a foundation for an asana practice that will help the specific areas in need. Clients who come in from physical therapy often say the asanas feel similar to what they were told to do daily by the P.T. I have found that "yoga therapy" is a great way to embrace new and healthy ways to practice the right asanas for recovery daily and the poses weave well before or after your physical therapy routine.

I remember taping my teacher's routine up on my wall and looking at it as I practiced everyday! I have received wide eyed thanks from students when I present them with their session notes. It's the simple pleasures that make life so magical!:-)

So, if you haven't tried a private yoga session yet because you were scared or intimidated, perhaps this blog has made you re-consider! For advanced and novice yogis alike, a personalized yoga class is a wonderful treat and can be life-saving on the mat and off!

Namaste!

Sarah Lamb, CYT, offers private yoga, reiki and reflexology sessions to her clients in Rochester, NY! Checkout this link for more info or to book today! www.innerbloomyoga.com/yoga.html

Giving in

We all go through "stuff". We all have stories.

We all go through daily ups and downs.

Yoga has taught me that the mind can play lots of "tricks"; it is truly like a wild horse that just wants to romp free... to think any which way.

Yes, the chaotic, untamed, wild-horsey of a mind is just a little, shall we say, cray-cray?!

A lot of clients and friends are telling me the past few weeks have been chaotic for them-- inside and out! Emotions and relationships are running wild. I have definitely felt that same turmoil bubbling and boiling in my mind, body and heart!

When the heat is turned up, there is a natural fight or flight instinct that comes up. When my students are in hip-openers or hamstring opening poses and some inversions, that same feeling of inner heat creates a desire to rush through the pose and just be done with it. BUT... this is when we need to hold-- be patient-- listen-- breathe and tap into that inner still, quiet place beneath the fire of release happening. I tell my students to be with the sensation and get out of the mind, because that is where all that struggle is occurring.

I tell you that life is like one long yoga pose. If we give into the mind and its impatience, we will fall out of our center, just like we want to consciously or subconsciously fall out of an intense asana in our practice.

Being a yogi is not about doing poses on a mat. A true yogi is ALWAYS doing yoga-- because it is a practice of the mind. If you are present with yourSelf in each moment, you are doing yoga.

The power and strength lies in the EVERY MOMENT presence. Ram Dass called it out when he wrote "Be Here Now". That's all we need: to BE... right HERE... right NOW.

Simple, right?

Hahaha. The great cosmic joke is the ego=the personality that makes us who we are as a human being. I remember having a profound spiritual opening just after I graduated from college and began working a few "soul-sucking" jobs. I was working with a spiritual teacher at the time and reading Krishnamurti and some Tibetan Buddhist stuff. I had also read through Seth books and Barbara Marciniak channeled works. I was also obsessed with the movie "Waking Life" at the time, just to give you a picture of where I was in my mind and with my Spirit. I was in this space of feeling the need to absolve my ego or somehow detach from it.

I remember having a day off from work and sitting in my living room on a sunny summer day with nothing to do. The mind likes to be active and have problems to solve, so usually in a dull moment, it comes up with some sort of question to ponder or thoughts to bounce around-- maybe feelings of some recent event, etc. In this moment there was NOTHING. I sat looking at my books with no desire to pick one up just to keep busy. In fact, I was happy just sitting and being with no desire for anything or to DO anything. This was a satori (an awakening) for me. I felt this deep sense of peace wash over me-- taking me over: it was bliss!

"This is it!" I thought. "This is what life is meant to be like: problem free, easygoing, light-filled and simple."
A teacher friend then called me and we had a nice chat where I shared this experience with him. He put it well: "The ego likes problems. Just watch, soon the mind will come up with something to stew on. But enjoy this peace-- anchor in it." Sure enough within a short time there was something to occupy my mind with and keep me busy "doing".
That doing I've found is the difference between ego-self and the spirit or soul-self. Ego likes DOING.

The Spirit likes Peace. Surrender. Presence. Stillness. Being!

The paradox is finding the Spirit in the storm. Being the peace in the chaos; the stillnes amongst the constant busyness.

This is why I chose the lotus for Inner Bloom: the beauty that lies in the muddy, mucky waters.

Here is one of my favorite hand mudras, lotus mudra. Try it! It stimulates the sensation of the lotus... that beauty, peace and profound stillness that resides within each one of us-- IS US!

Enjoy it!

~Sarah owns Inner Bloom, offering yoga, reflexology and energy work for deep release, healing and well-being. Sessions are local (Rochester, NY) and phone sessions are available for Reiki and Intuitive healing work

www.innerbloomyoga.com

Going with the FLOW

The only thing that feels real is the Heart.

It speaks in small beats, in between breaths. Shakespeare, Rumi, Rilke and other great writers and poets tapped into its rhythm.

Yoga brings us there with a focus on the breath: the sign of LIFE!

I am always open to signs and symbols.

This past year has been intense as far as personal lessons that have helped to show me my strength of mind and heart. I'd like to extend this to the broader whole-- embracing Jung's theory of the collective unconscious. I attended a wonderful workshop with Martha Beck last year. Martha is a Harvard trained anthropologist turned self help guru. She talked about the everyday shamans. With each 2 hour chunk of workshop over the course of 2 days, Martha would spend about 10 minutes talking and offering her story and wisdome she's gained from her life experience, and then open the floor up for questions from "the village", which would carry the 2 hours through at a rapid pace! One woman shared a dream she'd had the night before, and Martha said the dream, full of people, was a message for everyone in the room-- the village! It was truly a profound and symbolic dream. In fact, everyone's story resonated with me on some level. It was a weekend full of people sharing their hearts, so simple, yet so profound!

I have found in my practice of yoga since 1998, that we are truly one. The connection is simple: it lies in the breath... that beating of the heart and lungs that tells us, "Yep, you're ALIVE! Aren't you enjoying it?!"

I have noticed an amplification in healing releases from clients and personal issues surfacing in the past year (including last half of 2013 into 2014). So I know I am experiencing what we are all experiencing: purification.

I have noticed that when I ask for something, it comes rapidly or a sign of it "not coming yet" appears just as rapidly!

About 9 months ago, I told a healer friend I needed some energy work and wondered if she had any referrals to offer me (yup, the healer does need healing!). She immediately thought of 2 women and I called them both to inquire. I ended up doing a trade with one of them. When I offered her reflexology, she told me about this session she'd had twice in England that changed her life, and it was called Metamorphic Technique. Her energy when she described it and stories of transformation in her personal life after each session inspired me to research it. I found some good videos on YouTube and then let it go.
About 3 months ago I felt drawn to look up the sites again and searched for workshops in the US. I saw that there was one and only one held in Atlanta but once a year and it was 2 months away!

This year hit me hard financially due to some legal issues with my daughter's father, thus, I wasn't sure how I would be able to afford it! However, I truly believe if something is meant to be, then the Universe will flow in such a way that it will happen with grace and ease. I had enough flier miles to buy a round trip ticket (plane trip, check!). A friend then came in for a reflexology session the following week and I suddenly felt drawn to ask if she knew anyone in Atlanta. Guess what? She had 6 friends and family members there!!! She sent out an email and within a week an aunt responded that she would be glad to host me (place to stay, check!).
Suddenly, my tax refund came through (there was an issue with this around my separation), and I was able to pay for the training.

Just before I went, a friend did a blessing/prayer for my travels. At that point, I realized I would not be able to stay with the friend's aunt the 2nd night due to the distance from the training (Atlanta is a BIG city!), so my friend put out a prayer that I would have a place to stay. "It has already happened," he said.

So: signs that we are in alignment with the flow and open to living from our heart and not our head: miracles happen, constantly! Little or big, a miracle is a miracle. I LOVE the quote, "a miracle is a change in perception" from The Course in Miracles, because it SURE IS! When I'm in that FLOW state of mind, I'm appreciating everything. So here is a list of miracles from my trip... big or small... they are all AMAZING!

Miracle #1: My flight left at 12pm and I'm usually running late-- my 1st client of the day always sees me rush in up to 10 minutes late (hey, we're all human and I blame it on being a mom to a 3 year old!). Thus, I left for the airport around 1120am. In the car (as passenger, of course), I read on my boarding pass that plane boards at 11:26 am-- time check: 11:25am. "Oh no!"
I run into the airport, expecting a small line for security-- but it's Memorial Day weekend... line: NOT SO SMALL!
Instead of panicking I took a deep breath and remembered our intentions from the night before: all would flow divinely!
So, I said to the guy behind me, "I'm boarding now, do you think I'll make it?" He gave me a eyebrow raising look and then assured me I'd be fine. Just then a security person walked out in front of me and I felt compelled to tell him my plight. He also gave me an eyebrow raise and said, "So are you LATE?" Like a gentle repremanding father, he looked at me with compassion and opened the gate to let me through. BIG MIRACLE!

Miracle #2 I got to my gate, and yes they were indeed boarding. However, the 1st words I heard were, "We need 2 more people to volunteer to give up their seats to take the next flight and receive a free domestic plane ticket." I didn't hesitate. I went right up there and said, "I'll do it!" My flight was due in Atlanta 3 hours before my host got off of work, so the change wouldn't delay me at all! And a family was quite grateful to me. The 4 of us that volunteered had a great conversation and got some snacks for our airport wait. I also got bumped to business class (more leg room!) COOL MIRACLE!

Miracle #3 I have a healer friend that manages a cafe at the airport and she happened to start her shift when my plane boarded. I got to say a quick hello before I offered not to fly. I then got to go back and have a nice chat with her and get a free latte to boot (needed my morning coffee!). FUN MIRACLE!

Miracle #4 During my wait, I got to catch up with some dear friends via phone and enjoy some downtime

Miracle #5 My host the 1st night was very sweet and made me a healthy salad, offered me a beautiful room to sleep in and even packed me a lunch for my training the next day. While she drove me to my training, I got a nice little tour of some of Atlanta!

Miracle #6 I arrived at the training and several people commented about me being the "woman from New York". Apparently I was one of the 2 out of state travelers attending the training. The woman I sat next to said hello and then asked if I had a place to stay. When I said no, she offered to host me that night. AMAZING!
Now I will tell you, I have traveled with this level of trust before and always found amazing open-hearted people that offer up their home. It is a true testament to your faith. If need be I could have booked a hotel room, but how awesome is it to just be open and see what flows 1st? I made a new friend and she took me to a cool part of Atlanta for dinner that evening.

Miracle #6 Just being with Dominique (the Metamorphic teacher) was a lovely experience in and of itself. She is truly a kindred spirit and lives with that same openness in life. At the end of the training someone asked when she would do a longer retreat Metamorphic, maybe in India (where she travels often)? She said she love to! I then offered to teach yoga there and the response was, "Sure!" Now it doesn't seem logical or feasible to go to India to teach with a 3 year old at this point in time, but is amazing to explore new possibilities and see that you can truly say "YES!" to your dreams.

Miracle #7 Deep healing happened learning this simple technique and listening to stories about it. I had a very profound dream about a personal situation the 2nd night and results that a healing had occurred within a relationship that has been wounded for a while.

Miracle #8 Just offering this modality to myself, my family, and my clients upon my return has been a huge gift. I've noticed that it calms Wren down instantly when I put her to bed. I have had really positive feedback from clients that it is deeply relaxing and powerful.

Miracle #9 During the workshop, I felt drawn to host Dominique here in Rochester and have her offer the class so it can expand a bit more in the U.S. She was totally open to it. The other day I had 2 locations that popped up to do the training! I'm so excited! My future "miracle" would be to teach the classes myself and travel a bit to do so!

Miracle #10 I had window seats both ways (Yup, it's the little things that matter!)

(view from the plane)==>>>>

You know what they say about dreams, thoughts become things! ...So... it's already happened!

I really DO love surrendering problems up to the Universe (or God, All That Is, whatever word resonates for YOU!).

Another little/big miracle-- I love Starbucks chai. I had to do some legal stuff (which is NOT really my zen!) and treated myself to a chai after. On the way out to the car, I set it on my roof to open the door and the whole thing spilled. I'd only had a sip of it. Very sad moment.
I went back in to see if they'd replace it (they have before} but the line was really long all of the sudden. SO, I threw out the cup and said, "Oh well, I guess that wasn't meant to be" and got in my car to run another errand. Somehow the drink triggered a waterfall of emotion (mostly related to my personal situation). So, I let it flow freely and in the process somehow found myself driving to another Starbucks after my errand. "What am I doing here?" I thought. I suddenly got an email telling me my free drink was available on my Starbucks card (yep, I'm THAT into the chai!). Yippee! Even though that would be using up another drink, I thought I'll just go in and use it, after all, I'd driven all that way.

I went up to the register (emotions still showing on my face from what I released in the car) and the barista was super friendly. I suddenly blurted out that I spilled my chai and was getting a new one. No questions asked she said it was on the house and gave me a sympathetic look! So I spilled my drink at one Starbucks and get a drink from another! Pretty cool!

To me, this was another miracle and also portrays the law of balance in the Universe! The light has to balance out the dark. It was definitely a welcome little miracle! And all of this happens when we stop thinking and start listening...
because all that we need has already happened. We have to stop resisting and start trusting...

Curious about a Metamorphic Session? Rochester, NY or surrounding cities can book with Sarah here or go to the site for more info: www.innerbloomyoga.com

Loving YOU

All spiritual texts and traditions lead to the same place: back into your heart.

Paul Coelho's The Alchemist speaks a truth it takes many twists and turns for most of us to find; that the way home is not out there, but in here.

But... where is "here"?

Aha! That's just it! Over 15 years of yoga practice have led me to get it more and more each day, but I still have my moments where I feel totally and utterly LOST! It's those moments when the outside world reflects my insides: chaotic and confused. A few months into my separation my loving auntie gave me a copy of The Course in Miracles. A big dark blue book with a gold embossed title-- it looked like a new fangled version of the Bible. I took one look, flipped open the thin pages and thought, "not interested!". So I set it on my bookshelf and let it collect dust for sometime. Then, some clues started leading me to get curious. Life has some interesting ways of making us "get it" if we're not interested in paying attention. And Life sure is persistent! If one way isn't working, then it gives us more and more signs, symbols, people, and events to make us see what it wants us to see!

So... what did I see? Well, I saw in the lessons and work with a Course teacher, that the outer world is merely a reflection of my inner world. I got some of this from my yoga and spiritual practices, but I guess I didn't "get it" enough! It totally rocked my world!

So... it IS all about you-- or in this case, ME! If we can drop the concept of narcissism and expand it to a concept of Oneness... that all of life is interconnected, this becomes a very BIG idea! In the process of unwinding my feelings of separation from myself in others, I have found a deepened sense of compassion for all of life-- and the pain and suffering of others in a new way. Part of this process of unwinding involves daily shadow work. Debbie Ford really opened eyes, minds and hearts with her books on this subject! I have found daily shadow work to be an important way to come into acceptance of parts of myself I've disliked (like anger, insecurity, worry, to name a few). With a step by step process I've found helpful, I forgive myself for feeling that feeling that I've judged as "wrong" on some level and open to have it transformed (into love). It's amazing what happens. If I encounter an angry person, that same charge is gone and I can look at them with the compassion I gave myself in the process. The Universe usually gives you some practice sessions in real life (unrehearsed) to show off your hard work! And sometimes I've gotten A's... sometimes...D's-- all of that grading is done with compassion, of course! =)

Let's face it, humans are complex creatures. Our minds will trample us with all kinds of crazy thoughts if we allow them to without abandon. Loving you means loving your crazy mind-- getting to know it and understand it, and giving it space to express, release and expand.

The expansion part comes in giving YOU time to BE. The mind is like a computer and it's important to "reset" it each morning. I've found creating intentions for my day, giving gratitude for all that I have and will be receiving are great ways to center the mind for a new day. When you do this "waking up on the wrong side of the bed" flies out the window!

And the final part of loving YOU is loving your temple that is the body. Remember, we don't own these bodies-- they are not the spirit's permanent home. Just think of your body as a rental for this lifetime. When your Life is complete, that rental will be returned back to the earth-- but You (as a Soul Self) will still exist. This is fun to muse on.

Over the years, yoga and healing work have made me really LOVE and APPRECIATE my body! I have been doing nightly (or I try) epsom salt baths with lavendar essential oil. Epsom is a great way to relax the muscles and also clears away negative energy. During this time, I light some candles and listen to high vibe music (like classical or yoga station on Pandora) or listen to a spiritual talk on Youtube (Abraham/Hicks and Kryon are my current faves). When I do this, I sleep like a baby and my dreams are lucid and very clearing.

As a single mama to a 3 year old, I'm amazed I have been able to carve out the time to do what I need to do to take care of me (hey, it doesn't always happen the way I want it to-- Wren's my boss:0!)

My work makes me make ME a priority, because I can't offer others healing and relaxation if I am a tangled mess! I practice what I preach, it's the only way to live!

I am SO SO open to hearing some of your ways of LOVING YOU! Please do share.

Lots of Love, Light and Inner Peace,

Sarah ;0)

Who are You REALLY?

When I lived at Lama Foundation, a spiritual community started by Ram Dass in the late 60s/early 70s, we were called Lama Beans. The community was on a mountain just outside of Taos, New Mexico. It was 10,000 plus feet up in elevation on some old Native American land. The living was simple: straw bale houses, outhouses, outdoor showers in the summer. Solar power was our main power source. Winters were brutal up there. The community operated as a retreat center in the summer, and all community members went into hermitage mode in the non-summer months. So basically, you had 8 months of the year to go within! You were said to come into Lama a dried bean...and after being pressure cooked for a year, you left soft, mushy and delicious!

For my striving for balance self, the all work then no work schedule did not resonate! I lasted half a year in the community before I felt the need to be boiled elsewhere! ...After all, if we don't choose to be boiled, life will do it for us-- and often when we least expect it!

On the spiritual path, there is said to be many trials and tribulations. When we open to really getting to know ourselves, a Pandora's Box of chaos flows out; and that is where the fun begins!

Wren's father and I separated over a year and a half ago (we never married). It was a very hard choice to make-- as raising a child in a 2 home family was the not path I would have chosen on a conscious level for my daughters upbringing. However, a series of events and a deep whisper from my Heart led me to make this choice-- which then became a mutual choice for us both. (I believe Wren definitely "chose" us as her parents. She was a surprise pregnancy in a very new relationship-- but this may be explored more in a future post.)

For the past 18 months I have been a single parent. It has been one of the greatest challenges I have yet experienced in my life. It is truly showing me what I am made of! I will admit that this past year and a half has been filled with a lot of inner turmoil. While Wren's father is not the partner I am meant to be with for this life, I still have to co-parent with him. Our culture is permeated by divorced and separated parents trying to raise children. It is a new phenomenon and a MAJOR spiritual lesson! How do 2 people that just don't get each other-- or maybe even like each other-- continue to raise a child to be open to their own heart and mind on this planet? That is something I am currently living the answer to.

Unfortunately, we have had to get lawyers and are in the process of working out a legal agreement-- which is an area of life I am totally new to! I definitely have a greater appreciation for lawyers and what they represent in situations like this!

This whole situation has opened me to my Spirituality and Who I AM, on a deeper level. To be honest, it is revealing a lot of fears and shadows. It is true that we must walk through the darkness to appreciate the light. I am definitely in the midst of this darkness right now. My practice-- yoga, reiki and meditation, is my saving grace.
My offerings to others have also been a saving grace. I feel so, so blessed to be doing the work that I do in the world. When my clients come in, they give me SO, SO much, just by being who they are, where they are! It is amazing to also feel the bliss and peace of the healings they receive (and ultimately give to themselves on a higher level). When my client feels peace, I feel it too!

Right now, I am feeling humbled and grateful for the simple blessings of life. When I have been experiencing mental stress over my current legal predicament, I ask the Universe for guidance. Last night I got a fortune cookie message that said:

...Would you call that a sign???

I am reminded that we are never alone. In our deepest, darkest moments, we are held, supported and guided by Life!

I am GRATEFUL for you, who is reading this. You have stepped into my Heart... which holds both dark and light in this season of going within.

NAMASTE, my reader. THE LIGHT IN ME HONORS THE LIGHT WITHIN YOU!

Here is a video that helped me recently, if you are going through some troubles, maybe it will help you too!

I'm going to post the Rumi poem about the chickpea that was our theme at Lama...

Chickpea to Cook

A chickpea leaps almost over the rim of the pot
where it's being boiled.

"Why are you doing this to me?"

The cook knocks him down with the ladle.

"Don't you try to jump out.
You think I'm torturing you.
I'm giving you flavor,
so you can mix with spices and rice
and be the lovely vitality of a human being.

Remember when you drank rain in the garden.
That was for this."

Grace first. Sexual pleasure,
then a boiling new life begins,
and the Friend has something good to eat.

Eventually the chickpea
will say to the cook,
"Boil me some more.
Hit me with the skimming spoon.
I can't do this by myself.

I'm like an elephant that dreams of gardens
back in Hindustan and doesn't pay attention
to his driver. You're my cook, my driver,
my way into existence. I love your cooking."

The cook says,
"I was once like you,
fresh from the ground. Then I boiled in time,
and boiled in the body, two fierce boilings.

My animal soul grew powerful.
I controlled it with practices,
and boiled some more, and boiled
once beyond that,
and became your teacher

~Rumi